It’s not clear why this fellow put a chainsaw in his pants. Was he succumbing to an alcoholic impulse? Was he supplying ill-advised self-treatment for pruritis of the groin? Was his bladder full of gasoline and he only filled the tank of the chainsaw as a pay-it-forward gesture to the person who buys it? We will likely never know the facts, because he walked out of the shop with the chainsaw and has not been seen since.